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Continue reading →: Bids for Connection: Protecting Your Marriage in the First Responder LifestyleThe Emotional Bank Account Explained Psychologist John Gottman, known for decades of research on relationships, compares the health of a marriage to a bank account. He explains, “Every time you turn toward your partner’s bid for connection, you make a deposit in what I call the Emotional Bank Account. Every time you…
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Continue reading →: No Two People See the Same Rainbow: Finding Hope After the Storm
Yesterday, as I pulled into the parking lot of soccer practice, the notification came through that we were under a lightning delay. After the storm rolled through and practice finally started, I looked up and saw a breathtaking double rainbow. I snapped a picture, but of course the photo didn’t…
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Continue reading →: Chasing Waterfalls and Facing Pain: A Lesson in Healing
This picture was taken last August 27th—me, standing under a waterfall in Utah, bloodied, bruised, and freshly wounded from a nasty fall on the mountain. I had flown out to surprise my dear friend for her birthday, and in true “us” fashion, we set out to chase a waterfall together.…
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Continue reading →: “You and Me, We Got This”: Building Resilience in Marriage and CommunityAfter my officer was involved in an officer-involved shooting (OIS), I remember walking into the department, wrapping my arms around him, and whispering words I didn’t even realize would change us: “You and me, we got this.” It wasn’t planned. It wasn’t scripted. But in that moment, those six words…
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Continue reading →: Kiss the Sky: How Maren Morris’s Anthem from “The Wild Robot” Inspires Me to Live Fearlessly
Maren Morris’s song “Kiss The Sky,” written for the movie “The Wild Robot,” has become more than just a track I enjoy—it’s my personal anthem. From the first moment I heard it, I felt an undeniable connection, as if the lyrics were pulled directly from the pages of my own story. It wasn’t just…
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Continue reading →: Default Parenting in First Responder Families: How to Share the Load and Prevent Burnout.
What is the default parent? Being the default parent means you’re the one who carries the primary mental and emotional load of parenting, regardless of whether both parents are equally capable or present. It’s not just about doing the physical tasks (making meals, driving to practice, helping with homework) — it’s about being…
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Continue reading →: Lessons in Grit: Life Through a Soccer Tournament Lens
This weekend, I had the privilege of watching my middle kiddo play in his first soccer tournament of the fall season. It was a weekend of firsts—his first time with a new club, a new team, and his first chance to prove himself among unfamiliar teammates. From the moment they…
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Continue reading →: When Resentment Creeps In: Navigating Boundaries and Burnout in a First Responder Marriage
The other night, I lost it. I flipped out at my officer—not my proudest moment, but I’m committed to keeping things raw and real here, so I’m owning it. It was late. The middle child was struggling to wind down, and I was trying to carve out a little one-on-one…
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Continue reading →: Forged in the Fire: Why I Speak, Write, and Hold Space for First Responder Families
I never set out to become a voice for law enforcement spouses. I never imagined I’d be writing a book, speaking on stages, or creating spaces for other silent warriors to feel seen and heard. But the last few years have changed that. They stretched me in ways I didn’t…



